Wednesday, December 9, 2009

An open letter to my Nashville Girls

Today I took the final steps in making this move go from something I merely talk about (and stress over) to becoming a reality. Homes have been released and apartments have been secured. Utility companies have been given disconnect days. Moving companies are being dwindled down by cost and reputation. The kid's school has been notified of official withdrawal dates. I started packing! Whoa. It all suddenly feels VERY scary. I am moving ACROSS.THE.COUNTRY. To where I basically know 3 people. Holy shit Batman!!

Even as I have mini panic-attacks throughout the day, I feel an equal sense of calm and comfort. Like I'm doing exactly what I'm supposed to be doing. This move may seem completely crazy to some people but in the middle of all of the chaos and fear is this complete and total sense of clarity. My time here has expired. It is time to close this book. Not even move to a new chapter. My ass needs a whole new binding. I need a new BOOKSHELF. And I'm about to get me one. And I am so damn excited about it!

Packing however, poses a few challenges that I was unprepared for the obvious, that packing just sucks. I've been sorting through what goes and what gets trashed and I've already come across so many memories that have reminded me that I have made (and am about to leave!) the most divine little circle of friends here. I am usually very wary of females. No, I'm not the kind of woman who hates on other chicks. I just don't usually mesh so well with them.  I'm far more like one of the guys than one of the girls. I curse like a sailor, I burp, and I have no use for marriage. See? Seriously though, up until moving to Nashville, I have had TWO good friends. Those 2 are so fantastic that I never hoped to have anymore. I would never deign to be so greedy.  Then by some delightful alignment of planets in the skies I met some women here who are amazing and will be missed so terribly that my heart aches just writing this.

We've formed a group so phenomenally different in so many ways that we probably shouldn't even BE friends. I mean WORLDS apart. Older, younger, intellectual, creative, silly, serious, party animals, teetotalers, lovers, fighters, sugar, spice, saints & angels...this group fits all of it. In those differences comes this magic that I never in my life could have imagined would have happened. Their support over the course of the passed year especially, has been invaluable to me. These girls have helped keep my ass from going right over the deep end. They've let me laugh, cry, curse, drink, talk, pass out, talk some more and some more and even then, some more. They've become additions to my family. Spent holidays with me and my children and family.

And I'm going to miss them. I'm going to miss them more than any pretty words in the English language can ever do any of them justice. I'll miss Puerto Rican Sunday Fundays. I'll miss going to shows and restaurants and DANCING and Pure Barre-ing and shopping and drinking. I'll miss Cabana nights filled with gossip and love and wine and dessert! My heart hurts thinking about how limited these times will be after February.

It should be stated though that I worked as hard as I did to be sure that we are all on a certain social network for a reason. I will need constant communication with you all. Inside jokes will be in abundance and demanded. Trips to visit one another will happen. A LOT. For I believe in my heart of hearts that true friendship can never ever be diminished by time or distance. I believe we were all meant to be in each others lives to love and support each other. To make each other stronger, braver and better.

So this little post is especially for you my beautiful J Squad. You have enriched my life in so many ways. Big and small. You've touched the lives of my daughters. You've shown them that women are capable of healthy and significant relationships with one another. You've helped them deal with the pain they've dealt with this year. You put some of the color back in my life when my world went totally gray and you've breathed life back into my lungs when I was sure I was down to my last breath. You ladies are the model from which strong, positive, independent, fierce, loyal women were created. I know you will all blaze amazing trails for others to learn from and aspire to.

I'm only a phone call/text/Tweet away. So let's not let this be as bad as it may seem for the next few weeks. We are bound by something that a few silly states can't take away. When women come together, we become as we were meant to be. Unstoppable. I cannot wait to see what new journeys this new book will take me on...but it's the chapters that include you all that I know are going to make it that much better....

1 comment:

  1. Damn you. Now I'm crying before work! At least I haven't put on my mascara yet...
    This was beautiful. I feel the same way about you and the rest of the J Squad. And don't worry, there are still plenty of chapters that feature us all!