Another candle on the cake

I love my birthday. LOVE it.  It is MY own holiday.  In fact, I love it so much, I usually celebrate birthday week.  Not just for me either.  I do birthday week for my children too.  I like the whole thing too.  I like cake. I like presents.  I like cards.  I like gatherings with the people that I love and who love me. I like champagne and wine...and there is usually plenty of that flowing for my birthday festivities! There are holidays for all kinds of stupid shit,  (Please do NOT get me started about Valentine's day...) but birthdays are the day the good Lord gave us to celebrate ourselves. 

Well, I haven't been my usual chipper party self this year and that's really pissing me off right now. Yes, it's been an absolutely crap year but that's not what I mean. What I mean is that this is the first year I started to understand all of those women who cry on their birthday and sit in a dark room and will it away.  Yes kids. To add insult to injury and pile on to ALL the other injustices I've endured , this year gravity has begun to wage it's war on me. Now don't start planning all your replies to me about how great I "still" look and how I "look good for having had children."  Hear me out dammit.

You may have noticed if you've read the other posts that I am Puerto Rican. : )  Hence, I have always had a big ass.  I should pause here and make it very clear that I like having a big ass.  Well, in the past year, my lovely and most favorite body part has started to forget it's address and has started shacking up with my upper legs.  It's an absolute affront!  NOBODY wants the Butt-leg!!  WHY, I ask you, is my ass fooling around with my legs? What happened to the lovely curve there, that existed to separate the 2 properties?? Did it get evicted?  Oh, but yes it did. By none other than that rat bastard Gravity.

And Gravity is working on other parts of me too.  Don't think it's just working on just one region.  No sir.  It has started squatting on what used to be my upper arms and I now "lovingly" refer to as my mud flaps. (No, not those mud flaps...come on now. Get your minds out of the gutter. If I ever start blogging about my nether regions, I fully expect someone to come and confiscate my laptop.) You know what I mean, when you're waving and your entire arm jumps in on the action? If I waved with both hands I'd friggin take flight. Don't even get me started on the road map Gravity started on my forehead. When the hell did these lines start getting built? I know I frown quite a bit but DAMN! Now when I quit scowling, some of the squinty lines stay put. Then there are the dark circles and the random aches and pains I'll just wake up with. When did this all happen? Have I been so busy wallowing that I didn't notice? And could the past year be to blame for the aging I've suddenly started to endure? Oh Helllll NO!!

I know that aging is ultimately a privilege and that I should be gracious about it. I really do.  Truly, no matter how low I get I understand that every new day is a gift and it is meant to be lived to the fullest and appreciated.  But I am not ready to start conceding defeat just yet either! I don't want to be sitting in my room all alone on my special day crying and waiting for it to be over.  So, yes, some things may have started to change. Maybe some of them I can do something about.  And maybe some of them, I'm just going to have to start getting used to.  But on this next birthday coming up, I am going to get my sad, sorry (newly located) ass all done up. I'm going to rock my highest heels. I'm going to straighten up my posture (even if I'll have that weird lower back thing later) and I am going to surround myself with those who truly love me. Who don't see any of these new changes(yet!) and see through to the real me and love me still. I'm going to endure the embarrassment of being sung Happy Birthday in front of a whole lot of strangers and prepare my lungs to blow out one more candle on the cake. I'm going to happily celebrate ME. And come what may in this next year, I am going to thank God for each new day he gives me and whatever he throws my way.